Without A Map: A Memoir

New York Times Bestseller
2007 BookSense Selection
Kirkus Reviews Best Books of 2007
Elle Magazine Reader’s Pick
O Magazine Memoirs We Love

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Meredith Hall grew up bonded to her insular New Hampshire community, comforted by the hallmarks of belonging: perfect attendance in Sunday school, classmates who seemed more like cousins, teachers who held her up as a model student, a mother who loved her unconditionally. Then, at sixteen, she became pregnant, and all at once those who had held her close and kept her safe turned their backs.

 

The same day in 1965 that Meredith was expelled from school, her mother told her “You can’t stay here.” Her father and stepmother reluctantly offered Meredith a cold sanctuary until she gave birth to the child she gave up for adoption. Then she was banned from her father’s home forever. For the next decade she wandered, lost to society and to herself. Slowly, Meredith began stitching together a life that encircled her silenced and invisible grief.

 

When he was twenty-one years old, Meredith’s lost son found her. She learned that he had grown up in gritty poverty with an abusive father—in her own father’s hometown. Their reunion was tender and turbulent, a renaissance. Meredith’s parents never asked for her forgiveness, yet as they aged, she offered them her love.

 

Without a Map charts an extraordinary journey in which loss and betrayal evolve into compassion and ultimately wisdom.


Praise for Without A Map

 

“A modern-day Scarlet Letter.”
LA Times


“A lyrical, acutely observed memoir.”
—Jan Gardner, Boston Globe


“Hall emerges as a brave writer of tumultuous beauty.”
—Alanna Nash, Entertainment Weekly


 “Written in spare, unsentimental prose, Without a Map is stunning; Meredy’s reunion with her grown son (who was raised in poverty with an abusive father) is the highlight. Book groups, take note.”
—Emily Cook, Booklist


 “An unusually powerful coming-of-age memoir… Searching, humble, and quietly triumphant: Hall has managed to avoid all the easy clichés.”
Kirkus Reviews (Starred Review)


“Each chapter of Without a Map is polished and elegantly written…the structure is shapely and the book yields poignant insights.”
—Juliet Wittman, Washington Post


“Nostalgic for the good old days of Norman Rockwell America? Without a Map may forever change the way you look at small-town life. Meredith Hall’s memoir is a sobering portrayal of how punitive her close-knit New Hampshire community was in 1965 when, at the age of 16, she became pregnant in the course of a casual summer romance…Hall offers a testament to the importance of understanding and even forgiving the people who, however unconscious or unkind, have made us who we are.”
—Francine Prose, O Magazine


“As told in this poignant, unflinchingly assured memoir, the arc of Hall’s life after giving up her newborn son for adoption in 1966 was anything but traditional…Hall tells of that trek with journalistic dispassion, stripping it of self-indulgence and thus enhancing its honesty…. As she writes, there is not a whisper of self-pity or self-aggrandizement, so often the banes of memoir…. Hall does find a semblance of peace in her life, one rooted in nature, a theme that resonates throughout this exquisite memoir.”
—Robert Braile, Boston Globe


“In 1965, Meredith Hall was just another young girl who got pregnant at 16. Think you know the whole story? Guess again, because Hall colors outside the lines with this memoir, full of unexpected twists and turns…. Hall eloquently tells the story of her rebirth…. Achingly sad, this is a stunning exploration of the mystery of ‘love and all its failings…and its final redemptions.’ A haunting meditation on love, loss and family.”
—Caroline Leavitt, People (Four Stars)


“Meredith Hall boldly charts one of the bravest of stories, the journey from disrupted youth up through that most tricky and forbidding territory, the family circle. Bone-honest and strong in its every line, this work of memory is a remarkably deep retrieval of its times and souls, thereby reflecting our own.”
—Ivan Doig, author of Heart Earth


 “Without A Map tells an important and perceptive story about loss, about aloneness and isolation in a time of great need, about a life slowly coming back into focus and the calm that finally emerges. Meredith Hall is a brave new writer who earns our attention.”
—Annie Dillard, author of For the Time Being


“This is an unusually elegant memoir that feels as though its been carved straight out of Meredith Hall’s capacious heart. The story is riveting, the words perfect. It is rare to read a work that manages to be at once artful and compelling, which for me best describes Meredith Hall’s debut work. She is an author who deserves to be widely read. Few people write like this. Fewer still have the courage to live like this—without the comfort of any cliche.”
—Lauren Slater, author of Opening Skinner’s Box, Prozac Diary, and Welcome to My Country


 “Without a Map is Meredith Hall’s memoir, the story of giving up a child at the age of sixteen, and then meeting him when he was twenty-one, years later, and now forging a relationship with him. It’s an unbelievable read.”
—Robin Young, NPR’s “Here and Now”


 “Appalling and infuriating, yet uplifting and inspiring, Without A Map pulls you into Hall’s personal experience of sudden rejection and expulsion from her only sources of sustenance and connection. As an adoptive parent I cried and cheered for her through her exile and return to a very different home. Meredith Hall is a hero of awesome courage and eloquence.”
—Frank Kramer, Harvard Book Store, Cambridge, MA


 “Meredith Hall’s long journey from an inexcusably betrayed girlhood to the bittersweet mercies of womanhood is a triple triumph—of survival; of narration; and of forgiveness. Her portrait of her own empty bravado collapsing into total psychological and geographical dislocation is one of the most harrowing passages I’ve ever read. The subsequent turn toward memory and honesty is agonized, profound, and salvific. Without a Map is a masterpiece.”
—David James Duncan, author of The Brothers K and God Laughs and Plays


 “Meredith Hall’s story of loss, shame, and betrayal is also a story of joy, reconnection, and survival; each memory takes us deep to the marrow of sorrow and celebration. A work of extraordinary beauty and grace.”
—Kim Barnes, author of In the Wilderness: Coming of Age in Unknown Country


 “Meredith Hall’s magnificent book held me in its thrall from the moment I began reading the opening pages. Without A Map is a fluid, beautifully-written, hard-won piece of work that belongs on the shelf next to the best modern memoirs, and yet is in a category all its own. It is a moving example of a difficult life redeemed first through examination, then reflection, then finally—like a rough stone polished until it gleams—into a genuine work of art.”
—Dani Shapiro, author of Family History

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